Acceptance

I've done bits of venting here and there over the last day or so, but I think I'm overall hitting the "acceptance" phase of one part of my grief from the last few months. 

"Acceptance" doesn't mean that I'm happy with how things are, but it does mean that I'm learning to let go, and just know the hollow place is now a part of my internal geography. 

It's not the only hollow place.   I have another one that's about 15 years old, now, that still pops into the forefront of my mind from time to time. It still hurts, but I can't do anything about it, other than occasionally sending a friend request that I know will be refused.

This new hollow place will eventually lose its sharp edges, and just be another part of the landscape. It's already happening. Every day, the edges smooth a little more. Maybe some of the debris falls inside, and fills in the hole a little. 

Maybe not.

Weathering the storm

Two days past the election, and it seems the storms are going to continue, and possibly get worse, for a while. 

Make America Great again...in spite of the election

I remember, several months ago, talking to a customer at the Inn about the election.It was an older white guy, and I told him I was honestly scared by Trump's candidacy.

He told me not to be scared...to trust the process.

An older white man, with a good job, living comfortably...telling me not to be scared of what I was seeing...

Crochet Rag Rugs - Instructions/pattern

I started making rag rugs to use up extra fabric that I'd bought and never used...and now, a couple years later, I'm making them as stress relief...and because they're beautiful. I've posted a few pictures of them on facebook, and been asked for the pattern, so here's at least an initial set of instructions. Hopefully, there will be pictures to follow...

I generally make my rugs as ovals, so that is the set of instructions I'm giving.

From the person who's very not political...

For the first time in my life, I'm going to vote today. I've been old enough to vote for a very long time, but I never saw the point. In my mind, an uninformed voter was worse than someone who didn't vote at all, and I wasn't ever that informed. I also believed that the person in the white house didn't affect my life as much as the people in the senate did...trusting in the checks and balances built into the system.

Well...this time it matters. To me, and to my daughters, it matters.

Friendship on credit

There's a lot going on right now. More change than any other time in my life, I think. It's terrifying, and I feel very alone. I'm going to have to pick my battles, because I don't know that I can handle everything at once.This is not where I ever imagined or wanted my life to be.